Things I wish existed: Automatic earphone untangler

In this post I’m going on a similar tangent to the “jobs I wish existed” but instead I’m going for “Things I wished existed”. Why things? Because these particular situations seem more mundane to me and don’t warrant a proper job, like an envelope licker, or a shoelace tier. Can you imagine having a job where all you did was lick envelopes or tied other people’s shoes? Not me. So instead I’m putting them as things. Anyway enough explaining myself, on with the post.

Let’s have a little fun with this post and talk about a minor stressor that everyone faces.  You’re listening to music through your earphones (why? Maybe you were jogging, or walking or felt like listening to music in the middle of the night but didn’t want to disturb the neighbours), you’re done for now so you take of the earphones and put them in your pocket. Time passes and you feel like listening to music again, so you take out your earphones again and they’re entangled worse than medusa’s snake hair.

How did this happen? Did the earphones come to life in your pocket and decided they were sick and tired of the way you never cleaned them after using them so they decided to tangle themselves just to piss you off? Now you have to sit there and work at untangling them, a chore which is like solving a 4 x 4 rubik’s  cube.

We’ve all been there, sitting (or standing) on the spot slowly untying the wires trying to straighten it out completely or just enough till it was a good length. Or if you were the impatient type, you’d shake the living daylights out of it and pull at it randomly, hoping that it would somehow fix itself (Ahh, if it were only that simple).

That’s why I wish there was an automatic earphone untangler. The way I imagine it, it would be a small box like device with a slot on one end where you would put your entangled earphones, then you’d press the button on top, the machine would whirr for a few seconds, make a clicking noise and then a compartment would open up and you could take untangled earphones out and enjoy your music.

Sounds just grand to me. Any chance we can get someone working on that?

Of course it’s never going to happen, what with air-pods and wireless earphones becoming a thing. But hey, if they had actually made something like that years ago I probably would have bought it, as long as it was reasonably priced of course.

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